About loving yourself

"Love yourself!" they say. That’s the one step to becoming happy. However, nobody seems to offer tips or tricks for succeeding in this task. Let me tell you upfront—there’s no magic formula. One size definitely does not fit all when it comes to self-love.

To me, loving yourself is the purest form of existence. It means seeing yourself for who you are, what you stand for, how you act, and even how you react—and being okay with all of it. That’s what makes life bearable.

But let’s be real: self-love is not easy. It takes courage to confront everything about yourself, including the things you wish weren’t there. And even if you manage that confrontation, there’s another, harder level waiting for you: acceptance and forgiveness.

The Role of Acceptance

Accepting yourself starts with a simple truth: you’re human, and this is your first time on Earth—just like everyone else. None of us came with a handbook at birth. We didn’t choose our families, our countries, or even the fact that we were born. And yet, here we are.

Despite all the circumstances we didn’t control, we’ve learned to love our families and friends, appreciate our countries and cultures, and enjoy life’s simple pleasures—like nature and sunlight. So, why wouldn’t it be possible to love and appreciate the one thing that sticks with you through it all: yourself?

For me, this thought process was a breakthrough. If I could accept my existence and make the most of it, then I could learn to embrace myself too.

Becoming Your Own Best Friend

When I started my self-love journey, I decided to treat myself the way my best friend treats me: with understanding, forgiveness, and kindness. I began acting like my own cheerleader, showing myself the same support I’d offer someone I love.

And yes, call me crazy, but I even started having two-way conversations in my head. I’d talk to myself about random stuff, and surprisingly, it made spending time alone much more fun.

Being alone is one of the greatest teachers. Traveling alone tests your limits. Staying single for a while can be incredibly eye-opening too—but that’s a story for another time.

The Power of Forgiveness

Forgiveness might be the toughest part of self-love. We all make mistakes—some intentional, some not. We hurt others, and we hurt ourselves. Most of the time, we’re quick to seek forgiveness from others but rarely stop to ask ourselves: Have I forgiven me?

For years, I avoided that question. When I finally asked it, I realized my conscience wasn’t clear about many things. There were mistakes I hadn’t forgiven myself for—things that other people had probably forgotten about.

Confronting these feelings and making peace with my past has been freeing. It’s helped me own who I am and stand strong in that position.

The Journey, Not the Destination

I can say this: I like this version of me. I’m not in the “fully loving myself” stage yet, but it’s a work in progress. Some days, I take steps forward. On other days, I fall back into old habits.

And that’s okay. That’s what makes this a journey, not a destination. The constant progress, the setbacks, and the learning—it’s all part of being human. And humans? We make mistakes.

Self-love isn’t something you figure out overnight. It’s a process of learning, forgiving, and showing up for yourself every day. If there’s one thing I’ve learned, it’s this: you are the one person who will always be with you. So, why not make peace with that person?